My name is Tanya, I am approaching my 21st birthday and I have had Unspecified Juvenile Idiopathic Arthritis since I was 18 months old. I had only started toddling when my mum noticed I had started to limp. She took me to our GP who said it was probably a sprain and should settle but it didn’t and after many visits and ‘lame’ (excuse the pun) reasons for my limp I was referred to the local children’s hospital. I saw a Consultant Paediatrician that I’d seen before, as when I was 6 weeks old I had a really severe virus which made me seriously ill. However, I recovered and ended up back in hospital in 1978 under the care of the Consultant who saved my life 17 months before. He diagnosed Juvenile Idiopathic Arthritis and that was the beginning of many treatments and a slightly different lifestyle to what my mum had expected for me.

As I grew up I realised that I was different from others but in another way I was just the same. My biggest difference was that I used a wheelchair all the time (although today I can now walk after having surgery) and I felt I was too much hassle for my friends & they wouldn’t want to play with me. This proved to be true of those who weren’t real friends but I discovered there were plenty of others who did want to be my friend even though I was in a wheelchair. In fact, some of my friends really enjoyed racing down the street pushing me or hitching a ride on the back of my electric wheelchair. This soon stopped the worries I had that I would never have friends because I had arthritis. I also realised that no-one is normal, everybody has something in their life that makes them different and that is what makes each one of us individual. People wanted to be my friend not because I had arthritis but because I like doing  similar things to them whilst still having different interests as well.
One of my biggest worries whilst at school was how I was going to keep up with my friends as I seemed to spend an awful lot of time either at home off ill or in hospital and as I was nearing exams, was I going to pass them. From my point of view, when I was at school I felt I was constantly trying to catch up and when I was ill I just didn’t seem to have the energy to do any school work. However, my teachers were pleased with my work and I got a lot of encouragement from my parents, other relatives, teachers and the medical people around me and I feel this helped me through a really difficult time. Despite my frequent absences (I missed 9 months of school over the 2 years of my Standard Grade exams -   Scottish equivalent to GCSEs) I passed all my exams with good grades and went on to sit my Highers. 
As I came to the end of my school career I started to worry about the future. I had many questions, such as ‘How was I going to cope in the “real” world?’, ‘Would I be able to go to Uni?’, ‘Would I ever get a job?’, ‘What about boyfriends?’, ‘Would anyone ever want to marry me?’. Adolescence is a horrible time even if you don’t have arthritis and being a teenager is hard. I went through a horrible stage, alienating everyone and being totally obnoxious. My parents tried everything and I constantly rebelled. I was leaving home or doing anything just to annoy them. This is a stage most people go through. I wanted to be independent and felt I had to prove that I could be even though I did have arthritis. It did pass though, as all ‘phases’ (as adults call them) do. My biggest problem was that I didn’t know where I was going in life or what I was going to do. I did however eventually find what I was to do. 
When I was about 15  I met my local Young Arthritis Care Contact and  started going to our local group. This was a huge step for me as I’d never really met any young adults with arthritis and here were ‘normal’ people who had husbands, wives, careers and children. They were making successes of their lives despite having arthritis and subconsciously answered all my queries and worries. After going to a few group meetings I went on a Young Arthritis Care Personal Development Course and then realised that I’d like to get more involved so I became a Contact, I can honestly say that this was one of the best things I’ve ever done with my life, I gained confidence, more independence and found that I could really help others. I’ve made loads of really good friends and met people from all walks of life. 
I then started doing office work part-time as I wanted a break from heavy study but kept my brain ticking by studying through flexible learning at home. I went through a really bad flare and had to give up work for the time being and again started to drift. 
As far as boyfriends are concerned  I, like others my age, have had a few. Some good, some bad, some hunks and some jerks. I was always concerned that I’d never find a man who wanted to marry me because I lacked confidence in myself. However, an old school friend who I’ve always been close to kept asking me out and eventually I said yes. We started to get serious and on Saturday 5 October last year (1996) Murray asked me to marry him and presented me with a beautiful diamond engagement ring. I said yes and I have never been happier. Murray is my soulmate. We are completely compatible, know almost everything there is to know about each other and are totally in love (and I even get on really well with my future in-laws!!). We are now up to our elbows in wedding plans with both sets of parents and are even house hunting. I never thought I’d be doing either. 
Around the same time as we got engaged I also accepted a job with Young Arthritis Care as the editor of their magazine Young Arthritis News. I love to write and this is a job that I enjoy. I got the job because the previous  editor was leaving and I said to her as a joke ‘Oh! I’d love to do it’. I’d worked with her before on two other YAC publications A Day with Sam and The Ruff Guide so she knew I’d done writing before. She approached the relevant people and the rest as they say is history. 
Now I have a fiancé, a job, I am happy and I also passed my driving test first time in a manual car. I have my own independence as I’m mobile and I live in an extension on the back of my parents’ house. I am happy and content and although there will always be worries about the future, I know I’ll get there. 
The one message I would give to younger people with arthritis is keep trying, no matter what. If things get tough there is always light at the end of the tunnel, so don’t give up and keep looking to the future. You will get there in the end even if you have to go a different route.

Written by Tanya Lyke, Editor of Young Arthritis Care's Young Arthritis News.